Thoughts on pretentious quotes
I dont know what to write about. Again. Woohoo. It has become something very usual by this moment. I am not really sure about what I am doing and why I am doing it, but this is also somethinig I am very familiar with already. I just know I want to do it.
Some changes start to happen. I start to view this process as something ineviteble, in the sense that the only thing that iis left is to just put time in it. And I have been waiting for a long time for something like this. Because all the theory was clear, but encountering the right conditions that allow you to actually execute the theory is a completely different story.
Every time I write something in here and make it "bad" my mnid eases a liittle bit. I suppose I am doing soomething right if this is happening. In this current moment I am really confused, I dont have a formal goal inn my head, I dont know what "the right" way to do it is because I cannt quite remember where this way is supposed to lead me. And it makes it a little easier to actualy do something. I feel like sometimes it is these moments of connfusion that result inn somoething really honest, when you just do, because you are tired of self-preservation by doing it "right".
So much has become clearer yesterday. So many things I had to put on hold in order to get through other stuff, and after many years I have finally turned back to it. It wasn't just plain escaping, I knew there were a lot of questions I haven't resolved, but II just didn't how to get the answers back then. And now it is clear. And it is great. With every such resolution I just become calmer and calmer, everything feels right. The more you understand, the less you feel the need to change something. It is also funny how with understanding these pretentious quotes just become a part of your perception. Some philosopher said something about your language becoming more poetic the more wisdom you acquire, and it kinda works, I guess. The only way to do something right is to do it wrong. Somebody has definitely said that.
I guess that's it for now. I am glad I am still doing it.